Donna Karan New York.
Ok... I am going to be the one to say it...
I am SOOOOOO Done with this Zen Modern, Earth Mother, Granola Hippie Dippy Schitck that Donna has been Slopping forth on her Main Runway Collection for Nigh on too many years now. And this Downright DISASTROUS Spring 2014 Collection was so HUGELY Disappointing after her ASTOUNDING Spring 2014 DKNY Collection which was some of the best work of her career. It was just the newest collection in a LONG line of Truly Bewildering Collections from the house. This perhaps was one of the Worst.
Donna Could be, in the days of yore, called on to make women look Superhero Strong and Modern and SEXY! Sexy with a Capital SEX! Now... If Overly Complicated and Dishelved and Rolled out of bed looking is considered Sexy and Modern... I don't want to Know what Glamourous looks like!
It started off in the most unflattering and frankly... Unfashionable way. The clothes held no Sense of Sensuality or Modernity... they looked Haphazard and bound by no other thread than the colours and the persistence on wrap dressing. Which was not anything new for Karan, nor was it done in any way that she hasn't done in the past that was far more desirable. The Karan tropes were Familiar, Boring, and here appeared Dated and Ineffective. But more so... just Unappealing. No Woman, Not even the most Hippified College Professor at Berkeley in the 70's would want to look this.... Insipid!
What exactly was Karan trying to Accomplish? What was she trying to say? Throwing Garment on top of Garment... Was it Urban Jungle? City Safari? Multi-Culti Hippy? I cannot be sure, the waters were so muddied that any attempt at discerning a real KEY Point was lost! Hopelessly! An Awkward Khaki full skirt paired with a White shirt and a Khaki Washed Suede Cardi Jacket at Exit No. 19 held promise for it was one of the least confused as well as Exit No. 25 which consisted of a Burnt Orange Leather jacket that was Especially appealing and was matched PERFECTLY with a Cinnamon Wrap Dress. But aside from those.....
It is almost impossibly hard to point out anything but the bad in this collection and find something good. Each Exit just felt So EPICALLY Misjudged! This was not Style in the 2014 Mode... this wouldn't be stylish in any era!
If the collection started out with it's Phasers already set to Fail... things only Marginally moved up the ladder towards success in the Finale. As Pretty as Karlie Kloss and Joan Smalls Exits at Nos. 32 and 33 were they were not even barely capable of saving this collection and then after that.. the remaining gowns just felt Massively Underwhelming and Redundant... We've seen this Donna... WAY too many times...
It was a Flat our Failure, Chillrens. Just Plain and Simple. Nothing here is going to Inspire anyone but the most Die-Hard Karan-ite, And even they will find a hard time discerning the Wheat from SO Much Chaff!